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When I was in the seventh grade, I hurt my hip playing unorganized football. Since I was one of the few fat kids in the neighborhood, they’d give me the ball, and all the kids would jump on my back, and I would carry the pile toward the end zone. I was the William “The Refrigerator” Perry of my day.

One day, this Fridge malfunctioned.

The medical term for my condition was called slipped emphasis. In actuality, my ball and socket joint had slipped out of place. To correct it, I had to stay in the hospital for 13 weeks in a full body cast that went from my toes to my chest. The only two holes in it were there to allow me to take care my “business.”

Thirteen weeks of this for anybody would be brutal, but for a hyper seventh grader? Let’s just say I was miserable.

The doctors predicted that I would have arthritis at an early age because eventually the bones of the hip joint would fuse. And so it has. The bone on bone has been very painful for a very long time. In fact, it’s been this bad for maybe 15 to 20 years.

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